If you haven’t checked out this site (yeah, Who hasn’t!) you must now.  There’s even a picture of Enzo on there!

On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me two nothings and a nothing.

On the third day of Christmas, my not-so-true-anymore love gave to me three nothings, two nothings, and a nothing.

On the fourth day of Christmas, this person who I thought loved me gave me four calling nothings, three French nothings, two turtle nothings, and a big fat nothing in a nothing tree.

Now it’s the fifth day of Christmas, and it’s time for some passive aggressive payback, so I bought my true love a Ryan Anderson Design steel-top powder-coated table that seats six ($1,500).

Then, I bought two concrete and wood benches by Eric Billig ($800/ea).

Then I bought three French hens, and I ate them, because hauling around all this furniture was sapping my strength. Then I bought three multicolored chairs by Pedrali of Italy ($249/ea) that are molded UV-resistant plastic.

Finally, I bought this lazy lover of mine four (count ‘em, four!) Ryan Anderson side tables to surround this new back porch paradise where my true love will, under penalty of law, serenade me with wine and whip out five golden rings tonight. Or else.

I also picked up a fourth Pedrali chair, because three chairs was looking kinda weird.

[Come celebrate the 12 Days of Aviary before it's too late to blow your true love's mind with awesome, unexpected, non-traditional, cherishable gifts for Christmas or Kwanzaa or just the sheer "I love you this much" of it. Stay tuned for more gift ideas every day between now and when we run out of clever ideas for how to write them up.]

http://texasmusicmatters.kut.org/2010/11/09/caroline-casey-and-the-stringslingers-play-wednesday-night-at-the-aviary/

Who can argue with public radio? (Okay, aside from Sarah Palin.) As always, wine by the bottle is half-free. The price is right so come on down!

You see, the zombies are coming on Friday night. All of them.

Because we love you, we are turning Aviary into a safe Noah’s Ark for cool people. Here’s a list of all the ways we will keep you alive on Friday night:

• Everyone will be wearing a costume. This will confuse the zombies, as they won’t be able to tell real, tasty humans in disguise from inedible beings like Lady Gaga and the cast of Jersey Shore. There will be prizes for the best costume. The worst costume will get you eaten. Come prepared to compete.
• Bottles of wine are $10 cheaper. Bottles make handy weapons in a zombie fight. Bashing their heads in works, but — little known fact — so does rolling them at their feet! Zombies are clumsy.
• Quilmes is $3, Dogfish 90 is $5, and Wells Bombardier is $6. Beer bottles aren’t as effective as wine bottles, so these deals aren’t really to arm you with weapons. The reason we’re having such crazy good prices on insanely good beer is that it’s easier to deal with being attacked by carnivorous corpses when you’re sauced.
• DJ Boris will be spinning tunes. We encourage you to dance. Contrary to Michael Jackson’s opinion, zombies hate dancing. Like we said, they’re very clumsy, and dancing reminds them of how awkward they felt in 7th grade, when Suzanna Schissler refused to kiss them under the bleachers because she met a boy who could breakdance.
• Our usual delicious nibbles will be there for adult trick-or-treaters. Zombies have underdeveloped palates, so fine cheeses, meats and pates will confuse them. “You want brains, dead-head? How about some goose liver! Ha ha!” And then they run away. Well, shuffle away.

Those who come and take advantage of our various protections will be guaranteed survival and a chance to repopulate the human race. Those who don’t come … well … it will suck when we have to shoot you in the head.

Love,
Aviary Lounge

PS – Know that the robots have sent the zombies as a distraction. We may win the battle, but the robots are prepared for war. Extra points to anyone who double-covers their ass by coming dressed as a robot.

To celebrate, we’re throwing the biggest party in Aviary’s history. Since it’s also the weekend of Halloween, you bet your ass there’s going to be a costume contest. Prizes will include free aforementioned booze and food, and we’ll sweeten the pot as the month continues. There will also be live music, classic silent movies on the big screen, adult trick-or-treats, and the most special specials we’ve ever specialed. Like a Magic 8 Ball, you might need to shake us and wait a second before the details become clear, but you will be failing your duty as an American and as a human being if you do not mark your calendar and reserve the evening now. Just look how excited Enzo is about it:

While we’re talking about parties, Wednesdays are still going strong with 1/2-priced bottles and live music. Tonight, check out Mike Therieau, with a screening of Beetlejuice afterward (more on that in an hour or two).

The purses should be interesting, too. Like, made from recycled seat belts. Oh, and there should be beer. And wine. There should be a place where you can buy purses, drink beer, drink wine, watch football, and sit in a beanbag chair. That would be the best thing ever.

And you know what else? Snacks. Sandwiches. Interesting ones, with artisan bread and unusual meats and cheeses from around the world. It could be a combination of Whole Foods and snack foods. Not another chicken wing place, but a spot that says, “Buying purses and watching football means eating gourmet food and drinking delectable, sustainable wine.”

No! You know what? You know what else this town needs? A place where you can come in the afternoon at about 3 p.m. for the pre-game show, right? Get all excited for the contest, get the cheering lungs ready for the boys in burnt orange, maybe check out some cool purses … then order some beer or some wine to watch the game … then afterwards, there should be an art opening. A really cool one with awesome photography. And right after that, there should be a screening of The Lost Boys.

Okay, this might be asking too much. I mean, what kind of crazy person would own a business that puts all this random stuff together in one day? Still, it’s too bad a place like this doesn’t exist. Come on, Austin, get your act together! I thought this was the kind of town that could pull off a weird place with purses and football and beer and wine and sandwiches and beanbags and art and Corey Haim!

Best Saturday Ever kicks off tomorrow (Saturday) at Aviary Lounge at 3 pm.

These champagne chilling buckets are just as whimsical and cheerful as the chairs, an just as larger-than-life. In fact they’re about the size of ficus tree planters. Which begs the question: if you plant an empty champagne bottle, do you get a bubbly bush? Pick one up, love it, hug it, call it George, take it home, and experiment with your own boozy green thumb.